Where You Go, I Will Go. A Wedding Service. The Love Of Idgie and Ruth.

Rough draft: Sections of a wedding service for two queer women, written as an assignment.

Greeting and Introduction

The couple stands facing the one presiding.

Officiant: Welcome Partner #1 and Partner #2. Welcome to this day. A day made sacred by the presence of love and beloved community. Please turn to see all those who have gathered to share in the delight of your love.

The couple turns to face the gathering of witnesses.

Officiant: Look out and see the community who loves you and has gathered here to affirm the power, grace, and holiness of your love for one another. We know that love does not grow in isolation. It is nourished, supported, and challenged by those in our lives who bear witness to it. With us today are all those you see before you, all those who could not or would not be here, and all those who have gone before. We offer special thanks to those whose lives, hearts, and struggle have made this love, this moment, possible. You stand here today as part of their legacy. Your love is part of a rich history.

To those gathered, will you repeat after me.

Officiant: We see you.

People: We see you.

Officiant: We support you.

People: We support you.

Officiant: We delight in you.

People: We delight in you.

Officiant: We love you.

People: We love you.

Officiant: You may be seated.

The couple turns back to face the officiant.

Officiant: To love is an act of revolution; in spirit, in heart, in body, in mind. To love is to defy greed, control, and cynicism. To love is to claim the deep transformation that comes when we commit ourselves to one another and allow ourselves to be truly seen. In choosing to love we name ourselves worthy and step into the power of the divine love that connects each of us. To love is to recognize the lie of scarcity and choose a new path.

The Homily (aka A Short Sermon)

“Where you go, I will go;

    where you lodge, I will lodge;

your people shall be my people,

    and your God my God.”

I love these words. They speak to a sense of unity that so many of us long for. They come from the book of Ruth, an ancient tale of resilience and deep love. However, most of us probably know them from the sacred story of Idgie Threadgoode and Ruth Jamison in Fried Green Tomatoes. These were the words, found on a torn out page of the bible, that Ruth sent when she called for Idgie. Now, I’ve only seen the film so forgive me any inconsistencies with the book. But this was this passage that invited Idgie back into Ruth’s life. It was a commitment of the heart, but it was also an expression of need.

“Where you go, I will go;

    where you lodge, I will lodge;

your people shall be my people,

    and your God my God.”

Ruth and Idgie shared a love that saved both of their lives time and time again. Together they started a business, raised a child, nourished a community, and defied injustice. They built a life. It was a life that had not been modeled or laid before them. Each day they perfected their covenant. They laughed, wept, played, fought, and fiercely defended one another. Their love was quiet but transformative, not just for themselves but for all those whose lives they touched. And no, their lives were not free of violence, loss, or trial, but together they tasted a honey so sweet that it defied death.

Today we are here to celebrate the love of Partner #1 and Partner #2. Like Idgie and Ruth their love is one of creation. It does not remain confined to two hearts. Instead it moves into the world and lifts others up. We feel them do this in their music, their deep kindness, their cultivation of family, and the careful care they show to each other, their beloved dog, and their garden. I have felt that love and I know many here today have been touched by that love as well.

It is an honor to stand in celebration of a love that is so fierce, so evident, and so kind. Today we gather to bear witness to this love and the deep commitment that has long existed between your two hearts.

Just as your love transcends your pairing, so does this act of commitment. This world does not make it easy to love. There is profound heartache, incredible injustice, and wounds within each of us that escape naming. Love will be tested, and it will take more than the power of two to overcome. So as a community we also make a commitment to you.

Together we vow again…

Officiant: We see you.

People: We see you.

Officiant: We support you.

People: We support you.

Officiant: We delight in you.

People: We delight in you.

Officiant: We love you.

People: We love you.

May your love be as deep, comforting, and charmed as the love of Idgie and Ruth. May that love continue to grow and blossom thanks to its deep roots in care, respect, accountability, and passion. May you know the unconditional love and support of one another, of your community, and of all creation.